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/ 6/24/2006 06:26:00 PM
Saturday, June 24, 2006
There is irreversible change, because of some STUPID thing i posted, I'm such an idiot. There's no way nothing can change back, and just because of that stupid mistake of mine, I'm no longer a friend anymore. Once again, Billy Zheng Xiangpeng, has proved to the world that he is a pure, Black hearted bastard.
In trying to do something, he does something to a good friend. and therefore, he sucks. he is a heartless crap. Bill, is a freak. How can i reverse changes for what i have done? The last time it took me ages to redo what i did. and no matter what i do now it's impossible to change it back. I treasure this very, very much. what can i do? i just threw it all away because of a miscommunication. I'm no longer a friend. because of a miscommunication. so i guess she decideded to end the freindship. I treasure it alot. alot. like..my family?.. Hai. i finally convinced myself i can't make friends. I think it's impossible. i mean even being a good friend to someone in the end ends up as a waste. I can't describe how stupid, embarrased and sad i feel. I cried. What can i do now. school starts in a few days. i have things to do but yet i cannot bring myself to do things. i just want to let everything go. but cannot. Forget it. It's hard. But how to don't care. I'd rather die a horrible death than see that person hate me. I just suck alot..I'm true to what people say. I'm a loser.. I don't deserve to be anyone's friend..i don't,,i don't..Not to be anyone's son or brother...I think even...sometimes i should go and die..if i was gone.things would be better... I don't deserve...to be on this earth..living what i am...I don't deserve..god's grace..i don't deserve compassion or love..it's good i guess that no one cares...no one cares....no one... I feel very unhappy..I just want to die now..I'll just go and cut myself open and solve people's problems..people's problems.... .... help me...kill me.. .... ....;;;/ |
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