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/ 5/28/2006 01:33:00 PM
Sunday, May 28, 2006
Hai. Today i went to church. At first i was sian. Then i was okay..I'm quite happy to go there because the people there are so friendly..I went late though..but Song was kind enough to bring me there..Thanks Bro..Anyway..I'm just feeling so happy that at least there's a place i can let out my sorrows and sing my heart out..and just be nice and good again..After church i went to plaza sing for a while..then went to United square. I was quite bored..and i didn't want to go home..so I hanged around a bit..drank coke..and then finally went home. It started raining..but i felt okay. Well i'm here now..tired..but at least a bit comforted..
I understand i cannot move on..I just cannot. I'm stuck in a parodox?..But i have to accept it...It makes me very very very very sad to be like this..I mean..my brithday is here..i should be so happy..i got my electric guitar..i got so many things..i got so many friends..so many people are just nice to me now...and the holidays are coming..and my brother is back..and now i am so so upset because i made someone hate me...I just cannot be happy anymore..I cannot stand seeing people cry, and be in pain, or be so unhappy..It breaks my heart a million times like that...But its sometihing i have to do to live on...I must move on no matter if leaving it behing means driving thousands of spiked appendages into my body and running them up and down.. Well..my birthday is coming...and i just..wish that my pain will go away....If it;s there..then i have to just accept it..I'll celebrate my birthday a fifteen year old unhappy, broken, idiotic freak of nature..anyway...I just wanna thank some people for staying beside me...well..rona..ok....hai..but..nvm....song..thanks bro...wj...Thanks alot alot ok...?..I appreciate it alot alot alot..<3..lisa..i'll> I just dispensed my emotions and look what i got  |
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